There is no touch more amazing than the gift of unconditional touch, one which is given purely for touch’s sake. It is not being initiated as a precursor for sex or on condition that you return the favour. To allow ourselves to receive that touch fully, we must let go of any goals or specific outcomes, and instead be tuned in with and relax into, whatever we may be feeling in that present moment.
To give unconditional touch can be an incredibly sensual and healing experience, both for the giver and receiver. When giving, start by taking your awareness away from your partner and focus on your fingertips. Bring them to life! If you close your eyes when you begin to touch, this will heighten the sensations in the pads of your fingers. Make your intention one of meditation and visualise or feel the energy coming from your hands and fingers. Let your fingers sense what is desired in that moment rather than worrying about a technique.
You can use slow sweeping strokes, light stroking or even your breath. Blowing slowly up the spine will make your partner tingle! Let a hand just rest sometimes, perhaps on the heart, and take a moment just to connect together with the eyes. Explore the texture of the skin. Where does it change? Can you find the very smoothest part? Feel your partners body temperature and for any sensations such as tenseness or relaxation. Caress along the inner arms and the centre of the palms. Use your mouth and your breath around the neck and ears. Don’t overlook any parts of the body – you may be surprised which areas bring pleasure!
The key to giving fully, is staying present and connected to your partner, creating trust and intimacy. If you feel yourself forming an agenda or getting restless, acknowledge that as a distraction, and let yourself move through it, letting it pass.